Four Knights Alone
by DrowningInTheRainbow
Summary: All Slash! Kenlos/Kogan/Kames/OT4 sort of Kendall-centric four chapter fic. All deal with being lonely and finding that certain someone to comfort you. Finally Chapters 3 & 4 posted.
1. Chapter 1 Kenlos

BTR fanfic: Four Knights Alone

Chapters: 4

Pairings: Kenlos/Kogan/(one-sided)Kames/OT4

Note: No pairing is established unless it says so!

Disclaimer: I do not own anything except the plot-line. I in no way own Big Time Rush (BTR) or anything else mentioned in this fic.

Day One: So Lonely (Kenlos)

A/N: I have no idea how to make a souffle! And I don't like how the apartment is set up so sorry if my story can't quite correlate with the Palm Woods/Apartment 2J

Carlos laid in his bed, his helmet laying in his lap. He was alone in the apartment. Mrs. Knight was out grocery shopping, Katie in tow to scam a couple of naïve adults and/or teens into paying $5 for a $3 Big Time Rush T-Shirt. Mrs. Knight had given up trying to talk Katie out of scamming people. Hey, it paid for her college fund. The other boys left a few minutes after she did.

Logan was out with Camille, his best-friend/girlfriend outside of Big Time Rush. Their relationship was so confusing that Carlos didn't keep track anymore. Logan shared a room with Carlos because he couldn't keep his room clean. That wasn't entirely true, but Carlos never bothered to correct any of them. Now he laid in a perfectly clean room after Logan nearly trashed it trying to find the perfect outfit to go see Camille in.

That brings his thoughts to the original topic; he is alone. The boys in the room across the hall are gone as well; James and Kendall left to go to the pool. He knew James was probably spying on the ladies, as usual, but Carlos had no idea what Kendall was up to. You see, Carlos has a "thing" for Kendall. What this "thing" is, everyone except Carlos and Kendall seem to know. Where Kendall is oblivious to it, Carlos is misunderstanding towards it. Carlos sees it as friendship, although ignores the fact he doesn't feel the same towards James and Logan.

Carlos sighs and sets his helmet on his night stand and stands up. He stretches his legs and leaves the room silently. He enters the kitchen and opens up a cookbook. This was Carlos' hidden talent. Logan may be wicked with a first aid kit, James with a make-up bag, Kendall with a hockey stick, but give Carlos the proper ingredients and you got the closest thing to a chef in the Palm Woods! He quickly got to work on his favorite souffle, sure it was a dessert food but his chocolate cravings (that yes even boys have) kicked in. He was about half way through baking time unaware of the blonde boy entering the apartment...

~~Person/Place/Time Change~~

Kendall sat in a lounge chair under an umbrella laid out to protect him from the sun. Sure you might say he needs it, but after living in Minnesota, he just isn't suited looking as orange as James can get. He relaxes some as he thinks of his friends. He still feels bad for leaving Logan and Carlos just to lay by the pool. Heck, he didn't even invite them along! He knew Logan was going on a date/not-date with Camille but he still should of invited Carlos.

Ah, Carlos. Just the thought of the Latino boy sent shivers down his back. No one knew except Katie but, Kendall Knight is gay. Well actually James kind of knows too. He saw Kendall checking out Carlos once. But he didn't say anything, only sort of nodded his approval. Anyways he doubts the Latino could possibly be gay let alone like him back...

Kendall sighs and opens his eyes, clearing all thoughts of his long time crush from his mind. He gets out of the chair and walks over to James. "Hey I'm gonna go back to the apartment and get lunch. Are you coming?"

James noticed his presence and after registering what he said replies, "Nah, I'm not hungry yet but I might be up later. See ya buddy!" And with that James turns back to the crowd around him. Kendall nods in understanding and heads up to the apartment. Had he been in a rush he would take the elevator but, with simply no rush he took the stairs one small step at a time.

He eventually reaches his floor and opens the door to 2J. He sort of smiles unconsciously as he smells the food cooking the second he opens the door. He remembers the couple of times Mama Knight has let Carlos cook something. And awfully biased of the boys, they were surprised how good it was! He immediately headed to the kitchen and announced his presence, "Hey Carlos! Whatcha' cookin'?"

Carlos smiled at the boys long drawl, but replied anyways, "Something good. A souffle. Haven't quite finished yet so if you sit down and be a good boy, _maybe _I will let you try some." Carlos smiled as Kendall dejectedly sat down in a "tail between his legs" manor. Carlos returned to his cooking and finished very soon.

Kendall licked his lips as half the chocolaty dessert ended up on a plate before him, the other half across from him, as well as the boy of his dreams. They ate silently. Well that's how it was _after_ Kendall moaned at the pure deliciousness of this souffle! Carlos had simply smirked and continued eating, completely unaware of the blush on his own face.

* * *

><p>As the two finished, savoring every last possible crumb, they washed off their plates and set them out to dry. Carlos sat on the couch, Kendall stood aimlessly. Carlos suddenly spoke, somewhat harshly, "Go ahead. Leave. I'm sure you have plans." Carlos sighed as the television came to life and SpongeBob was on. He smiled a childish smile and zoned out.<p>

Well he was until a male form stepped in front of the television. Kendall turned the television off and turned around. "Carlos, what's wrong? For your information: I did have plans, with you! I was hoping you would come down to the pool and swim or just relax with me. I was going to ask if you wanted to until you snapped at me to leave. I'm sorry about not inviting you earlier." Kendall sat next to the Latino, awaiting a reply.

Carlos sighed and even hiccuped a bit as if he were about to cry. "W-well... everyb-body ignored me today, a-and then you came in here and I thought it was just so I could feed you and then you'd be on your merry way off to party some more with James." Carlos shook a bit until Kendall hugged him.

"...I'm sorry Carlitos," Kendall replied, calling Carlos a nick name established when they met years ago, "just so you know though I did come up here for a snack, but not to take advantage of your amazing culinary skills." Kendall finished staring into wet eyes of the Latino, still holding Carlos close to him, but enough so he can see his face fully.

Carlos smiled and muttered something incoherent before saying louder, "Well okay. I accept your apology and in return, I'll go with you. I'll race you to the pool!"

Carlos ran towards the door before Kendall yelled, "Carlos! You kinda need swimming trunks and a towel! Unless you plan on swimming nude!" Carlos got a glint in his eye barely noticeable until he ran to his room, coming out in just his swimming trunks and a towel folded over his shoulder. Kendall drooled a bit before also changing.

* * *

><p>The two suddenly realized that they were the only two in the pool, as well as in the area. Kendall gave a questioning look at Carlos until he realized the Latino had his own look on his face: mischief. Carlos suddenly swam over to Kendall. Kendall was too slow. Carlos grabbed Kendall's shoulders and pushed him under the water. Laughing as Kendall pushed him off and away, suddenly very aware at the imminent threat, he swam away from the mock-furious boy.<p>

The two were laughing as the back-and-forth game of cat-and-mouse was over the two were tired. Kendall motioned to get out of the water but found a Latino holding his leg. "Just one more thing Kendall." Kendall was pulled back towards the raven haired boy, suddenly very close. Their lips met softly at first, until Kendall reacted and kissed back. His dream was coming true! But alas the need for air arose and they separated.

Carlos was the first to speak, "Kendall I'm so sorry I hope this doesn't ruin our friendship it was just all these feelings and I just-" Kendall kissed Carlos again to shut him up.

"Carlos, this can't ruin our friendship. See I've had a crush on you for the longest time, just never acted on them. If anything, I think this will make us stronger!" Kendall said all honesty and such in his eyes.

Carlos smiled. "I've had these feelings too. I thought it was friendship and I couldn't understand why it wasn't the same as what I felt for Logan and James but when you came into the apartment and I told you the food wasn't done, the look on your face made me realize it was love. I love you, Kendall Knight."

Kendall looked so happy then. He pulled Carlos close and kissed him. "I love you too Carlos Garcia!" They kissed one more time before exiting the pool. They wrapped each other in a towel drying each other off before going back to the apartment.

No one was in the apartment so they entered hand in hand. They changed their clothes; Carlos into spongebob pajama pants and a very yellow shirt, Kendall on the other hand into plain black pajama pants and a black shirt on. When Kendall joined Carlos on the couch to cuddle Carlos commented: "Jeez sometimes you're such a Squidward." Which earned him a playful punch on the arm somehow leading to a full out tickle war.

Carlos laid on Kendall's chest on the floor. He smiled and said, "Now I don't feel so alone."

The End

So please Review and be nice with some kind criticism/thoughts/suggestions for next chapter! Thanks so much! I'll update soon!

-Love & Fluff, Rarusu!


	2. Chapter 2 Kogan

Four Knights Alone

Chapter 2 of 4

Pairings mentioned: Kogan, slight Jarlos (Jamille friendship)

Disclaimer: See Chapter 1

Author Note: Okay so I usually don't do this but here is my comment: Okay so I know Kenlos is everyone's least favorite but I mean come on people! One comment (that I am very thankful for!) I am very disappointed :( But anyways maybe this will bring more reviews... **sigh**

Also: This ignores whenever the boys found out Logan's real name was Hortence.

"Sleep Alone" (Kogan)

Logan sat silently at the work desk with a pile of papers before him, dressed in a black t-shirt with faded blue jeans. Logan and Carlos' work for the day was piled together on the desk in two separate stacks. You see Carlos isn't too smart, well not academically. So in exchange for Logan doing Carlos' school work, Carlos would cook a meal for Logan at anytime. As the deal was made the two boys ended up spending more time together. Logan snapped out of his thoughts and got back to work as the aforementioned boy entered the apartment and immediately so, the kitchen.

"What do you want for supper, Logie?" the Latino asked the smart boy. Carlos wrapped an apron over his white t-shirt and black skinny jeans. Carlos took out some basic pots and pans before looking to Logan for an answer. "Logie?"

"Sorry Carlitos. I have a lot on my mind, plus all this work. Um, how about lasagna tonight? Do you know if the others will be home later?" Logan put a certain emphasis on others Carlos immediately recognized. With the two boys getting closer they also shared a few secrets. Two of the big ones of Logan's: Logan was gay and didn't have a crush on Camille, and he had a crush on Kendall. He also felt a sort of dislike to James after he kissed Camille, but it wasn't big, nor a big secret. Carlos felt deeply sorry for Logan. Carlos is gay too but he has his eyes on James, which is not likely to ever happen.

"Sure buddy. I'll help you with some of the work. I don't think lasagna is a fair enough trade for that much work. And um, I think they went to see the three o'clock show, so they should be home soon." Carlos said and patted Logan on the shoulder before beginning to work on the lasagna.

~~Person/Place/Time Change~~

Kendall sat in the BTR mobile in a blue checkered long sleeve shirt and gray skinny jeans. while James finished signing papers and head shots. Kendall sighed as he couldn't wait to get home. He was afraid to think it, but he missed Logan. He's been feelings things like this for some time. He just couldn't quite pin point what it was...

Suddenly the door slammed, to awake Kendall, then the engine revved to life and they soon shoved off. "So what were you so deep in thought about?" James asked politely, dressed in an outfit much like the outfit like he had worn in the "City Is Ours" music video. (A/N: sorry to interrupt but I love how in the beginning of that video he has that shirt that blows open slightly revealing his muscular chest. I'll admit it: James is downright SEXY! LOL)

Kendall hesitated, as if pondering whether to tell the truth, or the almost truth. He settles for the second option. "Well I was just thinking about this person I like. I was kind of missing them." Kendall almost smiled at how well he _thought_ he had covered who he liked.

"It's Logan isn't it?" James replied bluntly. As he stopped at a stop sign he looked over at Kendall who had a shocked look on his face. "It's been pretty obvious, you know. You always want to go places with him, you look at him when he walks by, you hang your arm on his shoulders. You aren't as smooth as you think." James noticed the intersection was clear and pulled forward.

"You aren't angry, or disgusted even?" Kendall asked timidly. James shook his head, somewhat annoyed. Kendall just soaked everything in. "Yes, I love Logan. A lot. I don't think I could admit it to myself. But when you pointed it out, I guess it forced me to take it as it was."

James nodded in understanding. "I probably shouldn't tell you this, but Camille told me that Logan had told her when they were still friends that he had a crush on a certain blonde boy a.k.a. you!" James said. He looked over at Kendall, who was about to question him, but shushed him. "Don't question the power of girls and me with nothing better to do than gossip of potential couples." James smiled a famous smile before turning the BTR mobile off and beginning to head to the pool, Kendall just realizing they arrived at the Palm Woods. "So go get your brainiac. Oh and send my Latino down to swim with me."

Kendall brushed off the possessive comments and entered the elevator. He thought of what to say as the elevator slowly climbed to the second floor...

~~Person/Place/Time Change~~

Logan said something technical Carlos didn't understand. Carlos sighed and happened to look out the window to see the BTR mobile in the parking lot. Carlos smiled and stood up. "Logie how about we take a break. The lasagna was good but filling so I'm gonna go swim it off!" With that Carlos took off to his room and soon after out the door.

Carlos passed Kendall in the hallway, "Hey Kenny! I'm off to the pool!" He said then lowering his voice added, "He's all yours!" Carlos winked before jumping in the elevator and waving as the doors closed. Kendall thought it was weird, but continued on.

He knocked once before entering, being the polite gentleman he is. Kendall quickly took in his surroundings; to be more accurate, he found Logan. "Logan. I... I want to talk to you about something."

Logan looked up as he finished a paper. He noticed his blonde angel in front of him and before he started drooling invited Kendall to sit down. He proceeded by asking him, "So what is it you wanted to talk about?"

Kendall looked into Logan's creamy... brown?... eyes. Kendall snapped out of his thoughts and said, "Logan I... I've been feeling these... feelings... for you. I want to know if you feel the same way. So I'll just say it-"

"I love you, Kendall!" Logan suddenly burst. "I've felt that way for a long time and I'm sorry I interrupted you but I was so afraid you would say something bad and then you kept beating around the bush and-"

Kendall kissed Logan's mouth shut. "I love you too, _Hortence_." Kendall smirked as Logan pouted. On the paper in front of Logan at the top was signed, "Hortence 'Logan' Mitchell."

Logan blushed and whispered abashedly, "D-don't call me that!"

"I think it's cute. But I won't if you don't want me to, Logie-Bear!" Kendall got a playful smack before a sweet sugary kiss.

The boys had wandered off into their own mental tunnel of love and only separated when a flustered James and Carlos came in later, both wet and blushing. No questions were asked, only a silent agreement to renew their living arrangement and a silent goodnight. Kendall carried Logan to his bed, kissing him on the forehead. But when Kendall began to leave, Logan grabbed his hand and asked, "Please stay? I don't want to sleep alone anymore." Kendall climbed into bed and held his Logie-Bear close.

The End

Please Review! I NEED THEM SO BADLY! THEY MAKE ME FEEL LESS LIKE A LOSER! LOL just kidding but seriously they just might keep up the daily updates from this person!

Oh btw can anyone tell me what color the boys eyes (and hair color) are if I am incorrect: Logan: brown/brunette \Carlos: black/black \James: blue/brunette \Kendall: green/blonde /thanks a bundle!

-Love & Fluff, Rarusu!


	3. Chapter 3 Kames

Four Knights Alone

Chapter 3 of 4

Pairings: Kames, Cargan if you REALLY SQUINT!

Disclaimer: See Chapter One

Author's Note: I would like to apologize for (and I'm sorry for realizing it halfway in) but I have noticed that my supposed to be Kendall centric fic, hasn't been very Kendall centric. So to make up for it, this chapter is in Kendall's entire P.O.V. Yay!

Also I am very sorry but I can't write Kames (it goes against my religion lol jk), I don't understand it I'm very very sorry! My original plan was for this to be one-sided but I can't write unrequited love very well either :P lol

(Notice I never promised the characters were to be _in character_ lol! Also: italics indicate thoughts OR emphasis, sorry if it confuses!)

"Pretty Loneliness" (Kames)

_Kendall's P.O.V._

I sat on the infamous orange couch that sits in our apartment living room. Logan and Carlos sat next to me, although they were a little too close to each other, if given proper inspection. But I overlooked it for now and continued to stare in boredom. Logan once again creamed Carlos at a video game. Logan being a strategist; Carlos being a button masher. Sure Carlos could win against the four of us, but not just Logan.

"Hey Logie, I'm a sore loser you know. So I give up. Let's go for a swim!" Carlos said. He then quickly grabbed Logan's hand and fled to their room. _That was odd_ I thought to myself, then witnessed Carlos dragging a very distraught, almost _guilty_ Logan out to the pool. I sighed, now being alone. As if boredom wasn't enough.

Katie and Mrs. Knight were at an audition for another commercial, and James was at a modeling audition for visiting LA (A/N I was wondering if they have these, like I've seen for Detroit and other big cities?). That left me _alone_. Normally, I would be ecstatic. Not today. I was tempted to ask Carlos and Logan if I could go with them, but they left so quickly, _like they didn't __**want**__ me to come with them..._ That's it! I have got to get out of here!

~I stood up fully prepared to leave when a _ wall_ blocked my way. No not wall. It's warm. Hard. Soft. Smooth. _ Oh, __Gosh__! It's James! _I took note to apologize, until I noticed James wasn't exactly pushing me away, so much as pulling me in. He hugged me. It was a tiny bit awkward, due to our similar height, but it worked out somehow. And I was... happy.~

I suddenly awoke, never knowing I had fallen asleep. James was shaking my arm and mouthing for me to get up. I was staring at his lips, because I couldn't hear him. He stared concernedly at me. I told him I couldn't hear, immediately he enlisted my mother for help. She went into Mother Dearest mode and did _something I paid no attention to_ and told me not to stand up for exactly one hour.

James sat next to me on the couch, alone. After that dream, I wasn't so sure if I was happy he was here, or afraid. I wasn't sure what I felt towards him yet. Hell, I wasn't sure what I felt about what I feel for him. It seems like I've been missing something in my life, and when I'm with James, _that __something missing,_ is gone.

I feel alone right now, though James is next to me. I mean I can't exactly talk to James about my feelings for James, can I? Now, hear me out: I've seen the movies and shows where they try to hide who they have feelings for, but that never works! The person _always _finds out. So, then maybe I _should _try that?

_Ah heck I'm confusing myself. Eeney meeney... no... I love him. I love him not. I love... no! Gosh why is it so hard to decide whether I tell him or not! I mean all I have to say is "_Hey James, guess what? I might love you. I haven't quite figured it out myself yet though, so I'll get back to you." I noticed the body I had forgotten about next to me suddenly tense up. _Oh No! Did I just...?_

James stood up and left to go to the bathroom, so he said. Too bad the bathroom is not in the direction of our rooms. "James wait! I- I didn't mean to say anything! I just-" He sighed before continuing on to his/our room. "I'm sorry Jamie... I do love you..." I whispered softly. I glanced to the clock._ Dammit! 20 minutes left!_ I sighed, and suddenly felt a wetness on my cheeks. I was... crying? Sure I was hurt, but I didn't think so _that _much!

That's it! I've disobeyed rules before! Besides, I could hear now. I stood up and ran to mine and James' room to see him crying in his bed. I can't believe I have hurt him so much! I sat on the side of the bed. "James, I don't know what to say besides, I'm Sorry! It's true, I love you, but if you don't want me to, then I won't. It'll all go away, I promise. I'm really sorry!" I have tears streaming down my face, but I don't care. James was crying fiercely now.

I got up but felt a hand grasp mine and pull. Hard. I landed lips to lips with James. He was kissing me! "I- I love you too. I just didn't believe you when you said it. I thought it was all a joke. I'm sorry Kendall!" I only smiled, and kissed him again.

I finally had my pretty boy, who finally got rid of my pretty loneliness...

Author Note: Sorry it's so late! but finally I have the Kames done and hopefully a fluffy OT4 by Tuesday Night/Wednesday Morning. Okay so two things I've noticed about my writing, especially this chapter: I spend too much time on the beginning which pulls up the ending too soon, and I tend to ignore present/past tense rules occasionally. Sorry! Please review, I've missed all of you! Oh and give me some writing feedback!


	4. Chapter 4 OT4

Four Knights Alone

Chapter 4

Pairing: OT4

Disclaimer: See Chapter One

Chapter Summary: Kendall is alone on his birthday until "his boys" come home.

Author's Note: This is by far my favorite pairing! (Although it kinda bothers me when there are still pairings withing this pairing for example when Kendall and Logan are together but it's OT4. I don't like that. This will be strictly Kendall-centric, but will not favor pairings.) So I am going to write this hopefully fantastically, and NOT make this too horrible. Oh and I'm sorry that the whole Chapter 3 stuff went horribly so please review the Kames along with the OT4! I'm EXTREMELY SORRY! Please Read & Review!

Not So Alone (OT4)

_Normal P.O.V._

Kendall sat on the orange couch, alone as usual. Mrs. "Mama" Knight was out of town, due to sick relatives, but agreed that so long as Katie stays safe, Kendall is in charge. She will be home Tuesday (It's Friday). Speaking of Katie, she is down at the pool, scamming the next poor fool that comes along. Kendall, alone with his thoughts, sighs a sad breath. He misses his boys. He _really_ misses them. See, there is something you don't know about Kendall Knight. He's gay. For his near brothers. And recently, it's set him off edge. Mama Knight has been so worried about him, she even offered to come home early, but he said she needed grieving time/distance, which she thinks he needs...

~Person/Place/Time Change~

Carlos and James sat by the pool with their legs barely in the water, Logan sat a few feet behind them. "Hey guys, have you noticed the way Kendall has been acting? I'm really worried about him!" Carlos asked. James noted the way he moped when they weren't around; Logan noted that he often mumbled and wasn't passionate about the music. "We have to do something guys! I really lo- hope we find out what's wrong."

James and Logan noted what Carlos was about to say, but didn't comment on it. "I agree, Carlos," Logan said, "But then we have to get him to talk somehow, and he doesn't seem too eager to do so."

James got a brilliant idea, "What if we don't ask him! He doesn't have to tell _us_, so much as tell _someone_! We could get Katie to ask, or Camille?"

"Great idea James!" Logan said, "But do you think Katie or Camille would do it? I mean Katie is Kendall's little sister, and Camille is his best friend outside of us, or at least we hope." Logan gave a concerned look to his friends. 

Camille suddenly walked by, "Did someone say my name?" She asked.

"Well, um, yes we did. We wanted to know if you knew what's up with Kendall, he's been acting kinda strange. If you don't then maybe you could ask him?" James asked, Logan gave a concerned look, Carlos simply near tears. (A/N: I am not making Carlos the prominent lover, just the more innocent/forward person.)

"Sorry, I have noticed, but he hasn't said anything to me. But I can try to get him to talk!" Camille smiled and headed for the elevator, accepting the "thank you's" from the boys. She got off the elevator on the second floor, immediately heading for the well known 2J. She knocked once. Twice. Thrice. Kendall opened the door by the third knock.

"Oh it's just you Camille. Well, come in, I guess." Kendall said, not sounding too happy. Camille slapped him in the face.

"What **the HELL** is wrong with you? The boys were so upset they came to **me **to find out what is wrong with you! And you made Carlos **cry**! How long can you keep this- this- charade, up? Why can't you just tell them you love them? You are hurting them more than they could **ever** hurt you!" Camille pulled Kendall to the door. "I am going to go find Katie and ask her to go shopping at the mall for a few hours. If I get back and you haven't told them, I **might **hospitalize you!" And so, she left, Kendall stood dumbfounded.

Camille walked down the steps, her innocent facade back in place. The boys, huddled in the lobby, ran to her asking in various forms "What's wrong; will he be okay?"

"He wouldn't tell me. He said if it's so important to you, to ask him yourselves. You guys are right, he is kind of snippy. Please just go talk to him, I miss the old Kendall. I am going to go shopping for a few hours with Kate. Please fix him by then!" Camille then dragged Katie from the pool area, out the door.

~Person/Place/Time Change~

Camille closed the door behind her. _Well, this is it. Now or never. Heartbreak or Heartache. Knowing Now, or Never Knowing._ I had at some point in my thoughts drifted to the couch, when the door burst open. A crying Carlos, worried Logan, and emotionless James, entered the room. The three boys stared at the lone boy on the couch, he himself, returning the gesture.

"Listen guys, Just sit down and, I guess let me talk." Kendall started. The three nodded and sat down. "I am going to start off by telling you the basic of the _problem,_ then how they started. I am gay, for all of you." Carlos looked a mix of happy, jealous, and confused. James looked a mix of happy, sad, and perhaps disgusted, Logan looked just plain confused.

~Storyline 1~ (A/N: All the storyline's are narrated in Kendall's P.O.V.)

_It was the 5th grade and the teacher had read us a love story. Jokingly I had made kissy noises to my long time best friend Carlos, at recess, who had returned the gestures. On accident our lips brushed, and at the same time the bell rang. Carlos made a mad dash for the door. Unknowingly at the time, I had fallen in love. It wasn't just a crush, but at the time, that's how it felt. I was confused, not about my sexuality, but my feelings for Carlos. I didn't- and still don't- ever want to hurt Carlos Garcia._

~Storyline 2~

_A year or so later, I met the hottest boy ever. He came from a different school than mine, so I didn't even know his name, but I thought, wrongly again,it was just a crush. And just my luck he happened to be into hockey like Carlos and I. On some levels I hated him. He got all the attention, even mine. So naturally, I had to get as close as possible. He became my best friend too. I was confused, much like with Carlos, as to what exactly my feelings were for James, perfectly named Diamond._

~Storyline 3~

_Sometime later that same year, I met a nerdy boy that I couldn't help but befriend. Of course we met in detention. We had been wrongly accused of writing "Mr. Ruck is a Fuck" where as I had been in there for admitting to it the next class period. Mr. Ruck however couldn't null the detention ticket he gave the boy. I told him I was sorry and at first I thought he hated me, but I later realized he was a softy and he forgave me. We ended up talking and before I knew it, I fell in love. Again. But I didn't deny it. Not any of them. I accepted it all. I loved Logan Mitchell._

~End~

"And as you know we became the best of friends and all this happened and none of you had found out, I assume. But now that it's off my chest, well I don't care anymore. I love all three of you and if you love me then yay, if not goodbye!" Kendall finished.

When the boys didn't say anything, Kendall stood up and began to walk towards the door. Carlos grabbed his hand as he walked past him. "Kendall, I- I've always loved you too! I love all of you but I've loved you since then too! I- I just- Why? Why did you keep all this bottled up even if you hurt so much for it?"

"Because- I was afraid of rejection. What if I had told you and you all hated me before I got past the words 'I'm gay'?" Kendall replied. Carlos sighed before leaning in and kissing Kendall.

Logan spoke up next. "I can't exactly say I don't understand, but at the same time, I honestly don't fully understand. I do love you Kendall, but I don't know when, how, _why_. And it bothers me. I want to love you. But I won't lie to you, I have no idea what these feelings for any of you are yet."

Kendall simply nods, then accepts another kiss from Logan.

James was the difficult one. "I... I'm conflicted, to be honest. I can't say I love you, because I haven't felt that way in _years_. I did once upon a time, I mean it's always been apparent I was the most outwardly gay, but I fell hard for you Kendall. I would've done anything for you. But I could never have done this. Don't get me wrong I fell for the others too at some point, but you I fell for the longest time. Until I finally hit the ground. Hard. I want to free fall again, Kendall. I want to free fall with all of you."

Kendall held James close, not wanting to risk a kiss and hurt James more. He would let James have that control. The other boys joined in on the hug. "Now I'm not so alone..." Kendall whispered.

Camille and Katie stepped in a minute later, the boys still held together like glue. Katie silently walked to her room carrying her bags and mouthed to Camille, 'Let's do this again sometime!'

_**~The End~**_

Thanks all for reading! Please review and leave comments, suggestions, constructive criticism! I hope you join me for my next story: Define Love, a Kenlos fic!


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